Compost

I am the world's laziest composter. Thankfully, in regards to compost, it doesn't seem to matter much. Compost happens, as they say.

I know what the problem is, of course. Most of what I throw in there is too big. I should be chopping up leaves with the lawnmower, but I always end up just dumping them in as they are. Turf that I dig up from new beds gets thrown in there willy-nilly in big clumps. Kitchen scraps vary in size from tiny carrot peelings to whole cantaloupe (it was already super-soft, so I didn't want to risk cutting it open, ok?). I actually end up with two compost piles; I like to call them the start and finish pile. The start pile has all my big junk, the turf, leaves, twigs, old Halloween jack'o'lanterns, etc. Two or three times a year I'll turn this pile, forking out all the junk that's still in big clumps. The partially composted, smaller stuff goes into the finish pile, where it gets mixed in with grass clippings, eggshells, and my small kitchen scraps. I try to keep a stash of fallen leaves from the fall to mix into the finish pile and keep it from getting too ripe, but I never seem to have enough leaves in proportion to the grass.

Turning these two piles is a pretty monumental chore, one that can easily take up a good chunk of my Saturday afternoon. Thankfully I don't do it often. I know I'd get compost faster if I did do it often, and it probably wouldn't be as big a chore either, but compost is one of those things that's so easy to put off 'til another day.

I'm not exactly sure why I'm such a lazy composter, because the idea of composting is so fundamentally appealing to me. It's one of those small things that literally anyone can (and should) do to help the environment. Our trash cans are the emptiest ones on the block; not because we're making less trash, but because more of what we do make goes into the compost. All my non-meat kitchen scraps, non-glossy paper, old phone books, yard waste, heck even my dryer lint goes into the compost. (I draw the line at wet diapers though. I don't care if they can be composted, I'm not doing it in my yard.) Just the thought of all that stuff being turned into dirt instead of landfill space is reward enough. Or at least it should be.

Regardless, I have to admit I get disappointed when I see the final yield of my compost heaps. My compost needs always outweigh what I actually have. So many times I've been sorely tempted by the bags of yard waste sitting out by the curb of our neighbor's house. I've managed to restrain myself only with the knowledge that even if I do take it and throw it on my heap, it will probably be a year before I get anything out of it. If I ever stop being a lazy composter, I'll probably be known as the crazy lady who takes other people's trash.